A Soulful Way To Navigate Through Divorce
Looking at my life from the outside in, it seemed perfect, almost like a fairy tale. I met my husband when I was 19. I was in college, independent, living on my own…and ready. Ready to be loved, fully and completely. Ready to be taken care of. Ready to have a man adore me. Ready for that husband and family I had designed in my head and on paper in high school. Yup, I did. I wrote it out. I would be married by the time I was 25 with three kids and a jeep. It happened, minus the jeep.
We quickly jumped into a full-on love affair. Looking back, I had NO idea what I was doing but I wanted it to work so badly. It felt good, and right, and safe, and comforting and fun and fulfilling. Our love story played out in typical fashion. We got married. Bought a house. Had three beautiful amazing children…and kept living. But there was so much we didn’t do during this process that I now know resulted in our divorce. We didn’t work on ourselves. We didn’t help each other to grow and expand. We didn’t map out a plan for our family. We didn’t live and experience life outside of our little bubble. But most importantly we weren't aligned with our core values.
Things became so distant and isolated, and year after year we grew into a state of co-existing and grew farther and farther apart. We recognized it and for many years tried to figure it out, but neither one of us had the tools to do so. Looking back, all we did was talk about the problem but there were never any action steps taken to come up with a solution…to bring us back to that state of bliss we experienced in the early years. So we began to operate in a state of existing and not thriving, and year after year, it tugged at my soul. I stayed here for many many years. A Fork in the Road. Unsure. Unsettled. Unclear.
Fast forward many years, God started to speak to me and the universe started making our time and interaction extremely unsettling, disappointing and unpleasant. Oftentimes, I recount the moments during my divorce process where I felt myself constantly trying to catch my breath. As many women in my shoes, this experience created the utmost anxiety and mom guilt…questioning myself, my decisions, my desires, my dreams, goals.
I got to a really low place of uncertainty and confusion and I had to tap into something to bring me out. I used yoga and running as my medicine, my therapy and my fuel to get out of that dark space. I immersed myself in them. The asanas of yoga are a complete metaphor for life as is the process of running. The mental challenges I face in each practice forces me to push myself. Either through a pose until I find my balance and center or push through the first few miles until I finally catch my breath and find my rhythm. That’s what happened. I figured out how to flourish in flux.
Through that time with myself I also thought a lot about my mental health and how I would get through this time. The universe led me to create a company with my best friend along with another partner. We were all going through different struggles and knew other women were as well. So we named it Soul Abode…A Home for the Soul, because at that time, that is what we desperately needed. It’s a wellness platform rooted in the 6 Dimensions of Wellness. So I dove in and by doing all this soul work, I acknowledged my truth and made the decision to separate, then divorce. To express that still does bring about immense sadness and disappointment like ‘Damn Angela, why couldn’t you make it work?’, ‘Why couldn’t you fix it?’ But I am fully aware and accepting that this was God’s plan, not mine and so I have forgiven myself, released the guilt and am now thriving and ready for what God wants for my life. I’ve come so far. From the Fork in the Road. To The Uphill Course. To Paving the Path Forward. To now…The Heartful Heroine! I’m here. I made it. I got my second wind
Angela Williams brings her background as a personal concierge and graphic designer to this role. Her love for providing personalized service, keen attention to detail and an eye for visual.Read More
Shop the Story
Sign-up for our newsletter